5 Things You Can Do To Avoid Sibling Arguments Over Parental Estates
The division of a parent's estate after their passing is often an emotionally challenging time for siblings. And unfortunately, this can devolve into fights over money as well as over sentimental attachment during the probate process. But you can help prevent these draining and potentially expensive problems by taking some steps before things turn sour.
1. Work With a Skilled Attorney. The most important ally you can have when working through estate issues with other heirs is an experienced probate attorney. This lawyer has had many experiences with families of different shapes and sizes. They know what works and what doesn't. Consider their advice seriously on the strength of your own case and the best options you have available.
2. Stick With the Facts. Probate issues among family members often become heated and highly sentimental — which can lead to unwise choices or expensive legal delays. Instead, focus on your ability to prove your case with facts and documentation. Going to court over your parent's baseball card collection will be tricky if you can only argue that you know in your heart they wanted you to have it. You may have a better chance if you can put together a case that they wanted you to have certain specific cards.
3. Propose Alternative Resolution. Is your case not as strong as you'd like? Are things murky in the estate documents? In this situation, alternative dispute resolution may be your best route. Methods such as mediation offer a way to keep things out of court while achieving a solution that all can live with. By proposing mediation (or a similar method), you take control of a situation where you might not win if siblings want to go all the way to court.
4. Communicate Regularly. Talk with your attorney about how to communicate during this emotional time. In many families, regular and open communication helps all the heirs agree on a number of subjects. If you offer some ground rules early on and agree on things like how many personal items each party will choose, less must be decided if emotions run high during the process.
5. Decide Your 'Red Lines.' If you let yourself get very emotional at this time, every item or asset will seem like a must-have. Instead, form a priority list. While you may want the entire baseball card collection, which cards have particular sentimental value? If you focus on getting just those that are most important, you can let go of unnecessary arguments. Decide ahead of time which portions of the estate are 'red lines' over which you really cannot compromise and which aren't.
As you plan how to approach the division of your parent's estate, you can maintain a healthier position during a difficult time. And by understanding what your priorities are, how to build a good case, and when to let go, you'll be more likely to get what you really want and honor your parent's memory. Learn more by meeting with a probate attorney in your area today.